Thursday, September 1, 2016

Six Days to Forty

Not completing my PhD is the one thing that still bugs me. I have accepted that it is something that I have to let go for now, that this failure is not my defining moment, but when I see friends and even students succeeding at it, it hurts.

Academic writing has never been easy for me. My style of writing has never really suited with academic writing. I can’t be rigid and discipline enough for it. I swore when I struggled to finish my Master’s thesis that that will be my last attempt at academic paper. But I forgot that vow when the PhD opportunity dropped into my lap.

I want to say it was my biggest regret starting it, but whenever I want to say it, I am reminded because I was taking the time off to pursue my PhD, I met Phil. So I guess what happen is because it needs to happen.

I guess me being forty is not really a factor here, but at this point of my life, this failure smarts a lot, but who knows what tomorrow brings.

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