Dichotomy as defined is a division or contrast between two
things that are or are represented as being opposed or entirely different. When
I first learned of this concept in one of Dr. Quayyum’s literature class it
striked a chord in me. I have always felt that two extreme contrasting emotion battling
inside me. I can be extremely happy and extremely sad at the same time. Even
Dr. Quayyum once noted to me, that I confused him sometimes because my
assignments could be extremely brilliant in one and extremely dull and idiotic in
another (this wasn’t his words; this was my interpretation on his very
diplomatic comments).
A week ago after resolving a long confusing issue with a
happy outcome, not yet a conclusion but a resolution and clear plan that a satisfactory
outcome would be the end goal, I was really happy, on cloud nine really, but
the next day as I drive to work I was feeling really sad and in the car park I
broke down and cried. I was confuse, because deep down I know I was really
happy and these weren’t happy tears, It was what Mom would have called “crying
like your mom died” tears, and then it dawn on me as I cried out that one
phrase that I couldn’t stop, “I want my Mummy!” At my happiest moment I am
still really sad because I don’t have my mom to share it with. I miss you
Mummy.
Well I guess that is the beauty of how human emotion works,
allowing two extremes to exist in balance if not in harmony.