To Bubble Wrap the Kids or Not?

This morning as I was driving my brother to his driving test, I was listening to Mix.FM's breakfast show, Rod and Sarimah's chosen topic this morning is 'Do Parents Need to Control Their Kids Online Activity?' I was listening in to all the callers and various arguments put forth, it brought to mind how Phil's sister, Kirstie, had an incident happen to her eldest and wishing she could put all her kids in a bubble wrap to protect them from harm. I know the feeling, raising Abang, I have wished time and again that I could push all the hurt away from him and keep him safe from harm. I understood better why my parents were very protective of my sister and I when we were growing up. There is only so much a parent or guardian can do, it is a dangerous world, there is no practical way of protecting children from it, but we can train our children to be better prepared to defend themselves from the danger. I think that is best way to go, because if we want them to grow to their fullest potential, we can't keep them cocooned up, we need to let them be butterflies, just that we need to make sure they will be smart butterflies.

I remember when I was young I really wanted to learn to ride a bike, but dad absolutely refused it. Why you say? Well I was a difficult baby I think, I got into more scrapes than anyone could imagine, by age 7, I had 2 head injuries, an accident which caused me a tip of right pinky, got caught in barb wire, and various other scrapes. So my dad being very protective, thought he could save me from further harm by refusing me bike lessons. It didn't work, I was as stubborn then as I am today, I just cajoled my second cousin to let me practice on his bike. I am sure dad knew I was surreptitiously learning, because I came home with skinned knees and various other injuries from the many falls as I was learning, and I don't actually know till now why he kept quiet. Maybe he finally accepted that there was nothing he can do if I want something bad enough? Well when Abang came along he was on a bike from the day he could walk. I guess I taught dad that it is better to guide and supervise rather than forbid and have it done behind their back.

I guess that is why dad started to teach me how to drive when I was only thirteen. He taught me from 13 right up to when I took my license at age 19, until I finished university at age 23. Ten years to just teach me the defensive part of driving, he still have some small lessons until now when I drive.  But that is just it, there was no way dad could have stopped me from learning to drive, the only control he had was to make sure I become a very competent driver that I know how to handle any situation that would come my way. That is it really, there is no way parents can stop life's danger and risk from encroaching into their children's lives but they can make sure their children are well prepared for it.

So as I send boy to his driving test today, I kept telling him that he will do fine, and in my mind I kept telling myself, dad and I have taught him all we can, and he will be all right when he gets his license. There is no bubble wrap big enough and save enough for me to cocoon that little boy of mine, because he needs to come out as a strong, smart, beautiful butterfly, and we have done as much as possible to make sure he is ready for it.