Waiting to be Loved

I haven't posted in any of my blogs for quite a while now. Had a bad case of writer's block. Today as I try to learn to sing Sugarland's Stay , it moved me to write something. I turn 33 a few months ago, but my life is still unchange, still single, still living with parents, still wondering if I'd ever find a guy to love me for who I am, with all my flaws.

Listening to this song made me cry, I think any woman would, the voice of the singer alone is that evocative, let alone what the song is saying. But as I kept on listening, I can't help but think to myself, that for now I don't mine sharing a man to love, 'cause I have come to that point I am lonely enough that I'll take any crumbs I could get. Just to have someone loves me at this point is enough, God, I never knew, I could be this pathetic.

But then again, I grew up watching mom shares dad with so many others. I once jokingly said to a friend that I don't mind sharing, as long as the guy don't lie to me. He can have any other girl and me along as long as he tells me. The friend ask me if I have no self worth, don't I value myself enough? But that is just it, I know my own strength that I know it is something I can live with, not that it won't hurt, it'll hurt, but I have waited so long, that I know if that compromise is needed I am ready to do it.

So, when I was growing up, dreaming up my prince charming, I'd never think that one day I'd be willing to consider a prince charming with a princess already in his arm!