This year for your thirty nine birthday I did not prepare anything, I was expecting to have you here and I was going to give you a photobook of our memories in Malta. It has been a stressful few months since I left your side. Not knowing whether you will come and make me your wife finally was really hard. And I know you have had a rough time as well what with work being really hard on you. The constant silence because you had to sleep all the time because of exhaustion was really hard on me, not hearing from you for a day you know is torture for me, total silence for a week was painful. But the day you broke the silence and forward me your flight details and told me you love me so much and you could not let me down, made me the happiest girl in the world. It is finally going to happen. The one thing I have been praying for almost six years is going to come true. I am going to be your wife.
You don't know how happy I was anticipating your arrival, I have all of it planned, what I was going to wear, how my hair would be, what I am going to say. I was smilingly sleeping knowing you are coming. And then the text that brought back tears back tenfold, 'Hun I fell asleep and missed the flight'.
I know how hard you have been working and I know you have pushed yourself beyond your body's endurance. But I counted on your will to come to me so I believe so hard that it will happened. I bothered God every day asking for it. When that text came, my heart shattered, my world ended!
I know it is just another bump in the road. But right now my heart hurts so bad I can't see pass the pain.
Happy birthday hun, how I wish I could say it to you personally instead of another blog post. But hey who says life is fair hmm.
